What to Expect When You’re Expecting - Part 2 "The Good Stuff"

In my last blog I talked about what hardships you can expect in your life when you’re expecting to do a great work for God. I’ll admit, the post came off a bit “Debby Downer,” but if you’re like me, you don’t want things sugarcoated. Even Jesus told his disciples, “In this world you will have troubles, but take heart, I have overcome the world!”*

I’ve saved the best news for last. Let’s look at “the good stuff” in Nehemiah’s story. As you’ll see, when you obey God you can absolutely expect His help! 

God will send unlikely people to help you 

King Artaxerxes noticed that Nehemiah, his cupbearer, was “deeply troubled”* and asked him why. When Nehemiah explained how Jerusalem lay in ruins, the king asked how he could help. The king proceeded to give him time off, letters of recommendation, timber, and an armed guard. Did you see that--a heathen king helping his Jewish servant? That’s favor from an unlikely source!

Leaders will follow you

As Nehemiah describes the various people that helped build the wall, nine of the men were specifically referred to as “leaders.”* Why does that matter? Accomplishing a great work for God may require partnering with people of influence. “Influencers” can mobilize their followers. God will bring you “influencers” to help you raise the army needed to do the work.

People will be willing to work outside their specific talents to do the work that’s needed

A goldsmith, a perfume maker, priests, and merchants all became carpenters to help accomplish Nehemiah’s vision. One man even brought his daughters to help repair part of the wall, which back-in-the-day was considered “man’s work.” When you have a God-given vision, Spirit-led people will do whatever it takes to help you see it through.

You will develop a heart for the oppressed and even do something about it 

During a recent famine in Israel, the poor borrowed money at high interest rates from their wealthy family members just to survive. To pay back the debt, some were forced to sell their children into slavery! Nehemiah found out and was furious! He strongly rebuked those greedy relatives and demanded change. Because Nehemiah had proven himself a worthy leader, the people repented and changed their ways. What do you call that? A beautiful and unexpected side effect of obeying God!

My Nehemiah Experience

Just as my husband and I have experienced the difficulties of ministry, we’ve also seen God do all the “good stuff”. The unlikely people He’s sent our way to help, the gifted and talented leaders who serve alongside us . . . well, it’s miraculous. I’m always amazed how people will humbly serve to make our church plant succeed—getting up early to help transform our movie theatre into a church, helping with childcare, ushering, greeting, tearing down after service, etc. 

God also sent us an unlikely supporter--Joel Osteen. We’d only been a church for a few months when I produced a segment with the Osteen’s for The 700 Club. They found out I was a pastor’s wife, we talked about a few common friends we shared, and voila! Matt and I were invited to a private meeting with local pastors, given front row seats at his local “Night of Hope,” invited to become a Champion’s Network church and attend a CN pastors' conference at Lakewood Church. My husband and I eagerly attended and found ourselves laughing at the improbability of us being there. Looking around, pastors with mega-churches and multi-site campus churches surrounded us—and there we were, with our unknown little church plant of 200 people. Only God! 

My unexpected side effect of starting a church? I’ve developed a heart for women and children suffering from domestic violence. Before 3n1 Church, this cause was nowhere on my radar! While searching for some local community groups where our women could volunteer, I came across the H.E.R. Shelter, a temporary home for families escaping abusive situations. We’ve been working there almost 2 years, and I absolutely love these women and children!

I sincerely hope you will stick with the call of God on your life. It will be hard and you will be tempted to quit (BIG understatement). But if you will hold on to your God-given vision with the tenacity of a bulldog and the stubbornness of a mule, you will see God do unbelievable miracles. Keep expecting! 

* John 16:33
*facts taken from Nehemiah 2-4

The hardest thing. . .

The hardest thing about being a pastor’s wife is being a working pastor’s wife.

I don’t want this to come across as whining or “woe is me,” but I said that I would share the good, the bad, and the ugly about ministry, so I need to keep it real.

As a full time producer, I’m motivated to do my “best” at work. Working on a live TV show demands more perfection from me than anything I’ve ever done. There’s no room for error in my segments; it’s a live show, so there’s no “do-overs.”

Simultaneously, I want to give my best to our church body as well. I see areas that we can “perfect” and people who need my attention. I have so much I want to do in our community to reach people for Christ. Unfortunately, there’s only so many hours in a day, and there’s only so much “me” to go around.

So, what’s the result of my dual-career life? So far, it’s a worn-out, amped-up, can’t-wind-down Lori. I lust after the idea of a day where I’m accomplishing absolutely nothing while sitting in my backyard staring at my fence for hours on end. This can’t be God’s plan for me, right?

What’s the answer? So far, I don’t have one. I love where I work and I love my church. Financially, we’re not in a position to live on one income, so quitting my job isn’t an option. More than anything, I just want to be in the center of God’s will.

Does God allow us to go through tough times like this? Absolutely.

In his timeless classic My Utmost for His Highest, Oswald Chambers wrote:

“If we are going to live as disciples of Jesus, we have to remember that all efforts of worth and excellence are difficult. The Christian life is gloriously difficult, but difficulty does not make us faint and cave in—it stirs us up to overcome. Do we appreciate the miraculous salvation of Jesus Christ enough to be our utmost for His highest—our best for His glory?

Thank God that He does give us difficult things to do! His salvation is a joyous thing, but it is also something that requires bravery, courage, and holiness. It tests us for all we are worth . . .

God’s grace produces men and women with a strong family likeness to Jesus Christ, not pampered, spoiled weaklings. It takes a tremendous amount of discipline to live the worthy and excellent life of a disciple of Jesus in the realities of life. And it is always necessary for us to make an effort to live a life of worth and excellence.”

One thing I’ve learned in life is “this too shall pass.” I know my breakthrough is coming. I know that if I trust God, stay in His word, and don’t quit He will be faithful to help me through this season. The same goes for you. You might not have all the answers, things might not make sense, and you might feel like giving up. But if you just remain faithful in this difficult trial you’re in, breakthrough is coming.

P.S. I want to thank God for my family. Sometimes they get my “leftovers,” when they deserve so much more. I can honestly say my favorite part of the day is walking into my home, my “sanctuary,” after a day at work. I’m SO blessed!

Here's a glimse of what I do at The 700 Club

Nice to Meet You

My first post on my new blog . . . this is a big deal. I’m feeling the pressure to say something really deep, or incredibly funny, or maybe I’d even settle for “not bad.”

But before I can “WOW” you with my waxing-eloquent-writing-ability (or lack of!), you are probably saying, “Who are you?” So maybe I should just introduce myself.

I’m a struggling pastor’s wife and a busy working mom. I don’t have all the answers and I’ve only been a lead pastor’s wife for one year.

How would I define my 1^st year as a church planter? I will answer using “ing” words:

· Making mistakes

· Doing things WAY out of my comfort zone

· Over-scheduling my calendar

· Learning God’s miraculous grace firsthand

· Finding that people can be the greatest reward and the greatest challenge in ministry

· Learning that unity is absolutely vital and the one thing you fight for every single day as a church leader

· Protecting and nurturing my marriage and family

· Trying to find humor in things you initially want to cry about

· Marveling at the faithfulness of God

· The list goes on and on. . .

What qualifies me to tell other pastor’s wives how to survive? First, let me say how unqualified I feel most of the time! On the flip side, I know that God has been preparing me my whole life to do what I am doing right now.

You see, I was the daughter of a pastor and both of my grandfathers were preachers. I always felt called to full-time ministry, but in my mind I thought I would end up on the mission field. I married my sweetheart immediately after he graduated from Bible college. My husband and I youth pastored 11 years in Southern and Northern California, and we spent the last 10 years as associate pastors in San Leandro, Ca. and Chesapeake, Va. For the past year, we have been lead pastors in a church plant in Suffolk, Va.

So that’s who I am in 300+ words. In this blog, I hope to share things with you that God has and is teaching me as a pastor’s wife.